mi vida

my kittens laying next to me, chomping on a little plush panda and twirling her body left and right, all fiesty and shit; the sun is streaming in through my red pashima/makeshift curtain and there are paint stains on my pillows and sheets from painting juan and painting paper. there are tubes of paint and brushes and markers hidden in the small places, and a cup of colored paint water still on my nightstand, next to various scented candles and one big pink glittery bunny candle and the flowers and feathers i wear in my hair. this is the life i choose<3

KITTEEEN loovee

I adoted baby, baby kitten so I'm totally strung out, having barely slepttttt at all for 2 days.

I got a tumblr: littleflowers.tumblr.com

Fin.

the rescue

so after volunteering all day at invisible children's The Rescue event and having a 15 hour work-day, much of which was spent in the sun, and getting a wicked sun burn on my arms, neck, and face--and then sleeping in my sleeping bag outside during the windiest night ever and like 5 "it's going to rain" sprinkling freak-outs ...today I did nothing! I got home at like 7:30 or 8am, took a long (not-so-hot) shower, slept until 2, laid in bed until like 3:30, watched A Roman Holiday again and all i've had to eat all day is pizza. I feel accomplished and achy, and I'm pretty glad I got involved because I'll be spending a week in DC this June :D


therescue.invisiblechildren.com
watch the video! at the very least, you'll learn something.

ANIMAL COLLECTIVE IN JUNE!

i'm excited!!!!!@@#@$#$%$%

lullaby of birdland

today i checked out a dvd from the library of ella fitzgerald's performances in belgium '57 and sweden '63...and ahhhhhh

oh, april in paris<3

a few thoughtss

• i love audrey hepburn
• i want/need to revisit the amazingly beautiful and historic city of roma
• if you haven't seen 'a roman holiday,' your heart has missed out on some class A warming and i pity you.
  

currently reading

reincarnation

Matter cannot be created nor destroyed, thus we all are made up of so many earthy things. My soul has lived before and my flesh and organs have existed in different places, as different things. I am crystals, and bits of errupted volcano, I am the tiny bones of kittens past and the petals of many flowers come and gone, I am berries and trees and my mother and father. We're all just recycled goods, over and over, into new, bright things, and when we go our souls will split into two and we'll search all the world for a soulmate and probably, possibly never find them. I, and we, are spread all over the universe, because we're made up of the universe, and so the only way to be truly happy is to do everything in your power making sure that the universe is doing the very best. You don't know where your soulmate is, and maybe you never will, but it would hurt you if they lived a life of suffering.

la vie en rose

I love Edith Piaf!, I love this song, and I love the Armstrong version, and I've been humming it all day

i'm not much of a smoker

but these are my new faavorite drinking companions (aside from the ever-festive nat sherman fantasias).

Suddenly there is this pressure to intend and declare. My professors and peers are asking questions about what I'm studying and all of my plans, have I intended, have I declared. Well, I don't know, I don't know enough to intend or declare! My only plans are to travel and write poemsbooksstories and make things and sew and paint and photograph and love and drink tea everyday and have beautiful and strange dreams and swim around, but walk mostly.

happy and eexciited for the weeeekend<3

balance

spring break was delicious, but it left me wanting more. i am so tired of this semester, and of my living arrangements, and of my car/car shopping, and of things in general. but at the same time, things are going soo welllll. i'm working at starbucks again, i'm going dancing as often as i can, i'm spending lots of time with people that i LOVE, i'm loving juan as much as ever of course! and i'm reading books like crazy, not to mention as far as i can tell i'm getting straight A's again... but i've got writer's block again and i lost my digital camera (it was stolen at vagabond), which is probably the most disappointing thing that i have EVER done to myself. i shouldn't be complaining though, shti happens and we're planning the trip to nyc this year (if only we had set a daate) and i'll be away this weekend, just juan and i, and then again on april 10th we're going to orlando with my dad and sister. i'm a lucky girl and i'm so happy, things are so wonderful!, i just want out of this semesterrr and on to more new and beautifulllll thingssss.

doomedqueens

so, so worthy of your attention.

there will come soft rainsss by sara teasdale

(War Time)

There will come soft rains and the smell of the ground,
And swallows circling with their shimmering sound;

And frogs in the pools singing at night,
And wild plum trees in tremulous white,

Robins will wear their feathery fire
Whistling their whims on a low fence-wire;

And not one will know of the war, not one
Will care at last when it is done.

Not one would mind, neither bird nor tree
If mankind perished utterly;

And Spring herself, when she woke at dawn,
Would scarcely know that we were gone.

fishbowl head

It feels like my head is a fishbowl full of water that I'm trying to balance on my neck. I don't feel very well! We got home at like 4:30, but I really wasn't drunk at all so this hangover feeling doesn't make sense. And now we have plans to go out to lunch with his parents even though I've barely woken up... I need tea.
I feel like shit!

fotografers

top ten favorite photographers (in no particular order)
man ray
jacques henri lartigue
bill brandt
henri cartier-bresson
andré kertész
imogen cunningham
e. j. bellocq
walker evans
garry winogrand
eugene atget

I really loved taking History of Photography last semesterrr, and I can't wait to take the second part...next spring, I wish I could take it sooner!

::inspired by nikki's post and time on my hands

por supuesto

lots of tragic kingdom and return of saturn please, reunion tour.

i <3 richard avedon portraits.

things we carry

I was thinking about how I always carry my bag with me, and what I always have in it and how much I love all of those things. And what those things do or don't say about me. For the most part, people carry the same sort of things, but I think we all have at least a few things that only we carry with us day and day out.

I always carry:

• my red moleskine (for sketching and writing, which I also use for all of my classnotes and roughdrafts)
• a tiny, little hellokitty notebook (which I use as an agenda)
• pens (at least two different colored inks)
• whatever book I'm reading/looking through at the time (currently Valley of the Dolls by Jacqueline Susann)
  
• a little marie antoinette pillbox from the Louvre (which houses birth control pills)
  
• various tea bags
  
• two tiny bottles of oil fragrance: one I bought in France and one my dad bought me in Salem
• my iPod nano (which I never remember to charge)
• an accumulation of receipts I forget to throw away & fortune cookie fortunes
  
• hairties, at least one hairbow, and chapstick (hellokitty strawberry!)
  
• film, empty cannisters of film, cannisters with film to be developed
• ray bans
• wallet, keys, lighter(s) and I would say my phone if I didn't always forget it.
  

I sometimes also carry:

• BUBBLEGUM, mint gum, mentos, candy, etc. (a LOT of the time)
  
• my digital camera/my fish-eye camera/my oktomat camera/my polaroid camera
• nat sherman fantasias
• a scarf/shawl
• two different shades of red lipstick (I never have just one at a time)
• my nintendo ds
• crayons/colored pencils
• dried berries (for energy)

Mmmmmmm. Someone tell me what you carry!

Arrival of the Normandy Train, Gare Saint-Lazare

Claude Monet, 1877, oil on canvas


I've been writing lots lately! Mostly short stories, or maybe not, it's hard to tell because I haven't been able to finish even one of them. I hate ending things, it never comes easily.

i love this movie!

I love creepy shit. I love the eerie and the strange. I always have. I love the big, dead-eyed Blythe dolls and walking through a cemetery. I love the twisted, psycho, naked zombie anime and anything to do with skeletons and bones in general. I love blood splatter and exorcisms and sirens and black cats and santeria and voudou and dried up flowers. I find it all so beautiful! And I really don't see what is so wrong with that, judgemental freaks.

♥

Valentine's Day went surprisingly well for me! The stupid holiday is cute. Juan showed up at my dad's house around 10:30 last night, yay. I got lots of daisies, yellow-centered daisies! And cute things and chocolate, Juan gave me a pretty bound book of love letters and a tiny, pink bi-lingual collection of Neruda love poems to add to my collection of his work. It's so small I can carry it with me everywhere, I love it. My dad gave me a hello kitty comic book/anime maker/notebook thing from Japan? It's also very small and very cute, and he also got me a new red moleskine! Juan got a freshly baked carrot cake from me (his favorite, I hate it). Haha, it is in the shape of a heart and has us drawn in blue icing on top...it's ugly. Whatever!

I'm a lucky girl, so lucky.

la la la

I'm at my dad's, without Juan, it's weird! Being without him really isn't very weird at all, it's really just the thought of sleeping without him, though I'm sure I'm building it up to be much more 'different' or 'strange' than it actually will be. Hmmmm.
I've been painting with tea leaves in my moleskine more and more, and writing a lot. Not really writing or painting anything in particular, kind of just scattered thoughts. I'm really enjoying and getting a lot out of my photo class, not from the professor... at all, not to say he's not good at what he does, I'm just not getting anything from him. I just like that I have a reason to spend time developing and printing, which is a wonderful process that I likely would not spend [enough] time on if I weren't in a class. So I think I'm going to always be in a photo class, haha. Just, always, until I graduate. Maybe I'll minor. Mmmmmmm.

ahimsa

I've been trying really hard to be healthier. I'm eating better, and we've decided to cut down on meat and poultry, and only buy kosher and organic from now on. It's our own, very, very, very, very liberal form of Ahimsa, haha. Plus, it tastes better and is better for you. I've been sick for the last three weeks on and off, ranging from ridiculously paralyzing body aches and sore throat to a mild sniffle and cough, but I just cannot seem to shake whatever this is completely, I'm tired all the time and just hurt more than I should. And just when I finally thought everything was clearing up yesterday and the day before, I fell asleep last night not wearing any clothes with the fan on high and shivered in my sleep most of the night, too lazy/dreeaamy to actually wake up, move, and turn the fan off. Ironically, I had dreams about snow and pneumonia. Not ironically, I woke up with a sore throat, slight cough, and headache. I was cold all day today, even in sunny seventy five degrees.

button eyes

Animated stop motion in 3D? I'm excited, it's going to be beautiful to look at<3

hoppy

Bar hopping makes for a yummy dinner. Altogether we shared a rainbow roll, lobster spring rolls, 'pineapple chicken', fried calamari, and bernaise sliders. Yummy yay for appetizers! Plus I got to try tons of strange/different beers.
We're at my dad's for the weekend, which as I get older, is a better and better time. My dad and I are so much alike, I so wasn't the milkman's kid despite the talk. I love him very much plus I get along with Juliet and he just adores Juan (it's totally ridiculous). Part of the reason I love being here so much is because it's probably the only home that I can still go to (the house I was mostly raised in is no longer in the family), and feel like I'm home, like home-home. I have so many memories on this big neglected farm land and in this house, and my dad still has all of my childhood toys and books and summer dresses. There are bright colored little weeds, like the little purple budded ones or the ones that can pass for mini-daisies, growing from everywhere outside amidst these huuuge pine trees, an old water well, and all of the forts I built with friends are still intact, though a bit overgrown with vines and weeds and palm frawns and whathaveyou. It's so soft and warm and colorful, and of course I still have a big bed and bedroom here that I have all to myself (and Juan).
I'm just happy to be here, like always. The art is Modigliani, Picasso's arch enemy.

note to self

Photographing people is far superior to photographing things.

oh jackson!

Have you googled today? It's all Pollocked up for his birthday today, which I think is just darling. Happy Birthday you dead, fairly unpopular, but extremely well-known artist, you!<3


(it says google)

roly poly

The other day I went into the CVS closest to my house looking for polaroid film and I was told they were out of stock and would not be in stock again. Of course, I freaked out...even though I was able to purchase plenty of the film from a walgreens like 5 minutes away. So I've been on a sort of polaroid rampage, and I don't think I will be able to slow down until I'm forced to because it's a very sad thing for me. I actually just scanned a ton of them from the past few weeks but I really don't think I am going to share them all, at least not yet.

Oh, and today, Juan and I skipped our first class and went to a sunflower field. That wasn't the intention for the day, but it turned out so well and I've decided that flowers make me so happy, even when the worst shit ever is happening. I've never been to a sunflower field really, I've really only seen them from the bus window in Italy, and being in one is so beautiful. They were so much taller than us and it was shady and cool and private and the flowers are so huge, some were bigger than my head! Days have been so good lately.

like dylan in the movies

02.Like Dylan in the Movies - Belle and Sebastian

aw, I love this song!

Ooh

I cut & darkened my haaair. Next step, henna!

Obama's inaugural speech

My fellow citizens:

I stand here today humbled by the task before us, grateful for the trust you have bestowed, mindful of the sacrifices borne by our ancestors. I thank President Bush for his service to our nation, as well as the generosity and co-operation he has shown throughout this transition.

Forty-four Americans have now taken the presidential oath. The words have been spoken during rising tides of prosperity and the still waters of peace. Yet, every so often the oath is taken amidst gathering clouds and raging storms. At these moments, America has carried on not simply because of the skill or vision of those in high office, but because We the People have remained faithful to the ideals of our forbearers, and true to our founding documents.
So it has been. So it must be with this generation of Americans.

That we are in the midst of crisis is now well understood. Our nation is at war, against a far-reaching network of violence and hatred. Our economy is badly weakened, a consequence of greed and irresponsibility on the part of some, but also our collective failure to make hard choices and prepare the nation for a new age. Homes have been lost; jobs shed; businesses shuttered. Our health care is too costly; our schools fail too many; and each day brings further evidence that the ways we use energy strengthen our adversaries and threaten our planet.
These are the indicators of crisis, subject to data and statistics. Less measurable but no less profound is a sapping of confidence across our land - a nagging fear that America's decline is inevitable, and that the next generation must lower its sights.

Today I say to you that the challenges we face are real. They are serious and they are many. They will not be met easily or in a short span of time. But know this, America - they will be met.
On this day, we gather because we have chosen hope over fear, unity of purpose over conflict and discord.

On this day, we come to proclaim an end to the petty grievances and false promises, the recriminations and worn out dogmas, that for far too long have strangled our politics.
We remain a young nation, but in the words of Scripture, the time has come to set aside childish things. The time has come to reaffirm our enduring spirit; to choose our better history; to carry forward that precious gift, that noble idea, passed on from generation to generation: the God-given promise that all are equal, all are free, and all deserve a chance to pursue their full measure of happiness.

In reaffirming the greatness of our nation, we understand that greatness is never a given. It must be earned. Our journey has never been one of short-cuts or settling for less. It has not been the path for the faint-hearted - for those who prefer leisure over work, or seek only the pleasures of riches and fame. Rather, it has been the risk-takers, the doers, the makers of things - some celebrated but more often men and women obscure in their labour, who have carried us up the long, rugged path towards prosperity and freedom.

For us, they packed up their few worldly possessions and travelled across oceans in search of a new life.

For us, they toiled in sweatshops and settled the West; endured the lash of the whip and ploughed the hard earth.

For us, they fought and died, in places like Concord and Gettysburg; Normandy and Khe Sahn.
Time and again these men and women struggled and sacrificed and worked till their hands were raw so that we might live a better life. They saw America as bigger than the sum of our individual ambitions; greater than all the differences of birth or wealth or faction.
This is the journey we continue today. We remain the most prosperous, powerful nation on Earth. Our workers are no less productive than when this crisis began. Our minds are no less inventive, our goods and services no less needed than they were last week or last month or last year. Our capacity remains undiminished. But our time of standing pat, of protecting narrow interests and putting off unpleasant decisions - that time has surely passed. Starting today, we must pick ourselves up, dust ourselves off, and begin again the work of remaking America.
For everywhere we look, there is work to be done. The state of the economy calls for action, bold and swift, and we will act - not only to create new jobs, but to lay a new foundation for growth. We will build the roads and bridges, the electric grids and digital lines that feed our commerce and bind us together. We will restore science to its rightful place, and wield technology's wonders to raise health care's quality and lower its cost. We will harness the sun and the winds and the soil to fuel our cars and run our factories. And we will transform our schools and colleges and universities to meet the demands of a new age. All this we can do. And all this we will do.
Now, there are some who question the scale of our ambitions - who suggest that our system cannot tolerate too many big plans. Their memories are short. For they have forgotten what this country has already done; what free men and women can achieve when imagination is joined to common purpose, and necessity to courage.

What the cynics fail to understand is that the ground has shifted beneath them - that the stale political arguments that have consumed us for so long no longer apply. The question we ask today is not whether our government is too big or too small, but whether it works - whether it helps families find jobs at a decent wage, care they can afford, a retirement that is dignified. Where the answer is yes, we intend to move forward. Where the answer is no, programs will end. And those of us who manage the public's dollars will be held to account - to spend wisely, reform bad habits, and do our business in the light of day - because only then can we restore the vital trust between a people and their government.

Nor is the question before us whether the market is a force for good or ill. Its power to generate wealth and expand freedom is unmatched, but this crisis has reminded us that without a watchful eye, the market can spin out of control - and that a nation cannot prosper long when it favours only the prosperous. The success of our economy has always depended not just on the size of our Gross Domestic Product, but on the reach of our prosperity; on our ability to extend opportunity to every willing heart - not out of charity, but because it is the surest route to our common good.

As for our common defence, we reject as false the choice between our safety and our ideals. Our Founding Fathers, faced with perils we can scarcely imagine, drafted a charter to assure the rule of law and the rights of man, a charter expanded by the blood of generations. Those ideals still light the world, and we will not give them up for expedience's sake. And so to all other peoples and governments who are watching today, from the grandest capitals to the small village where my father was born: know that America is a friend of each nation and every man, woman, and child who seeks a future of peace and dignity, and that we are ready to lead once more.
Recall that earlier generations faced down fascism and communism not just with missiles and tanks, but with sturdy alliances and enduring convictions. They understood that our power alone cannot protect us, nor does it entitle us to do as we please. Instead, they knew that our power grows through its prudent use; our security emanates from the justness of our cause, the force of our example, the tempering qualities of humility and restraint.

We are the keepers of this legacy. Guided by these principles once more, we can meet those new threats that demand even greater effort - even greater cooperation and understanding between nations. We will begin to responsibly leave Iraq to its people, and forge a hard-earned peace in Afghanistan. With old friends and former foes, we will work tirelessly to lessen the nuclear threat, and roll back the spectre of a warming planet. We will not apologise for our way of life, nor will we waver in its defense, and for those who seek to advance their aims by inducing terror and slaughtering innocents, we say to you now that our spirit is stronger and cannot be broken; you cannot outlast us, and we will defeat you.

For we know that our patchwork heritage is a strength, not a weakness. We are a nation of Christians and Muslims, Jews and Hindus - and non-believers. We are shaped by every language and culture, drawn from every end of this Earth; and because we have tasted the bitter swill of civil war and segregation, and emerged from that dark chapter stronger and more united, we cannot help but believe that the old hatreds shall someday pass; that the lines of tribe shall soon dissolve; that as the world grows smaller, our common humanity shall reveal itself; and that America must play its role in ushering in a new era of peace.

To the Muslim world, we seek a new way forward, based on mutual interest and mutual respect. To those leaders around the globe who seek to sow conflict, or blame their society's ills on the West - know that your people will judge you on what you can build, not what you destroy. To those who cling to power through corruption and deceit and the silencing of dissent, know that you are on the wrong side of history; but that we will extend a hand if you are willing to unclench your fist.

To the people of poor nations, we pledge to work alongside you to make your farms flourish and let clean waters flow; to nourish starved bodies and feed hungry minds. And to those nations like ours that enjoy relative plenty, we say we can no longer afford indifference to suffering outside our borders; nor can we consume the world's resources without regard to effect. For the world has changed, and we must change with it.

As we consider the road that unfolds before us, we remember with humble gratitude those brave Americans who, at this very hour, patrol far-off deserts and distant mountains. They have something to tell us today, just as the fallen heroes who lie in Arlington whisper through the ages. We honor them not only because they are guardians of our liberty, but because they embody the spirit of service; a willingness to find meaning in something greater than themselves. And yet, at this moment - a moment that will define a generation - it is precisely this spirit that must inhabit us all.

For as much as government can do and must do, it is ultimately the faith and determination of the American people upon which this nation relies. It is the kindness to take in a stranger when the levees break, the selflessness of workers who would rather cut their hours than see a friend lose their job which sees us through our darkest hours. It is the fire-fighter's courage to storm a stairway filled with smoke, but also a parent's willingness to nurture a child, that finally decides our fate.

Our challenges may be new. The instruments with which we meet them may be new. But those values upon which our success depends - hard work and honesty, courage and fair play, tolerance and curiosity, loyalty and patriotism - these things are old. These things are true. They have been the quiet force of progress throughout our history. What is demanded then is a return to these truths. What is required of us now is a new era of responsibility - a recognition, on the part of every American, that we have duties to ourselves, our nation, and the world, duties that we do not grudgingly accept but rather seize gladly, firm in the knowledge that there is nothing so satisfying to the spirit, so defining of our character, than giving our all to a difficult task.
This is the price and the promise of citizenship.

This is the source of our confidence - the knowledge that God calls on us to shape an uncertain destiny.

This is the meaning of our liberty and our creed - why men and women and children of every race and every faith can join in celebration across this magnificent mall, and why a man whose father less than sixty years ago might not have been served at a local restaurant can now stand before you to take a most sacred oath.

So let us mark this day with remembrance, of who we are and how far we have travelled. In the year of America's birth, in the coldest of months, a small band of patriots huddled by dying campfires on the shores of an icy river. The capital was abandoned. The enemy was advancing. The snow was stained with blood. At a moment when the outcome of our revolution was most in doubt, the father of our nation ordered these words be read to the people: "Let it be told to the future world...that in the depth of winter, when nothing but hope and virtue could survive...that the city and the country, alarmed at one common danger, came forth to meet [it]."
America. In the face of our common dangers, in this winter of our hardship, let us remember these timeless words. With hope and virtue, let us brave once more the icy currents, and endure what storms may come. Let it be said by our children's children that when we were tested we refused to let this journey end, that we did not turn back nor did we falter; and with eyes fixed on the horizon and God's grace upon us, we carried forth that great gift of freedom and delivered it safely to future generations.

5

• studying religion is just as enjoyable as studying history and/or art history for me. I just love to memorize facts, stories, theories, whatever. is it strange that I don't have any desire at all to have theories of my own? I just want to know things.
• green tea ice cream can really turn a day around. for the better. not only because it is so delicious, but it's also such a pretty shade of green. certainly more pleasing to the eye than pistachio or mint.
• as a sort of addition to the previous fact, cheap, good, Japanese buffets are wonderful!
• Slumdog Millionaire really was the "feel good" movie to calm my economic stress, and it will so be yours too. it's everyone's! it was such a wonderful and beautiful story that I hardly noticed the actors, which is probably the reason why none of them are nominated for an Oscar, but they were all very good of course, and visually, it was stunninggggg. I really want to visit India, with learning all about it in class right now and watching this movie, I feel like nowhere in the world could offer more of a culture shock.
• Yates is depressing! So depressing! Revolutionary Road is a really great book so far, but I'm so depressed because of it. I'm really not seeing the comparison of it and The Great Gatsby... I guess it is a sort of portrait of the 1950's suburban lifestyle, and The Great Gatsby does that for the 20's but it's different, I don't know. I'm sad!

reading richard yate's revolutionary road

I realize that all relationships are essentially the same. You have love moments, and moments when you're tired of everything including the love moments, and you make habits and you have comfortable things, and things change, but then you get used to them, and make new habits and get comfortable with different things, and then you hate it all, and then you feel like you need it all, and then you hate it all, and then you think what else is there? and then you're all like, this is the point anyways, and then you're like whatever, I'm happy, and then you really are happy, really, really happy and comfortable and in love with someone and their habits and your together habits and then you hate it all, but then you don't. And you're like, it's worth it, and you're like, is it? but you don't want it to be over, so it's not. until you do. And then maybe you don't again. And sometimes you go days or weeks or months without thinking about these things and then sometimes you think about them constantly. But basically, you have a companion, that counts on you, that you count on, a person who you can hate the most in the world but is the person you love most in the world, is the only person who matters sometimes, is the only person at all sometimes. I don't know, it's a cycle, maybe people work on different cycles, and obviously they have different habits and comfort zones and whatever, but it's all the same shit. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't. I don't know.

oscars checklist

2009 best picture nominees:

• the curious case of benjamin button
  
• frost/nixon
  
• milk
  
• the reader 
  
• slumdog millionaire

other 2009 nominated films I plan on making an effort to see:

• revolutionary road
• doubt
• rachel getting married 
  

(bold means I've seen it)

P.S.

In case you aren't aware, the artist who created the icon that was/is the Obama campaign is named Shepard Fairey, and yesterday, his orignal 'Hope' piece was inducted into the Smithsonian National Portrait Gallery. It may not seem like a big deal, but that is huuuge for contemporary art and street art, in particular. Just sayin'.

Obama is president!

Bush is gone!

(photograph: Kwaku Alston)

oh how i dream of a dress made of poppies

Frank Cadogan Cowper,

titled and inspired by La Belle Dame Sans Merci, written by John Keats

quiet

Our tiny world was wrapped in a cocoon of night and smog. She was driving and I was watching the road. Big trees leaned over the road, tired and heavy with humidity and there was music playing, some distant sound of dreams tinging together like champagne glasses. My brain was heavy like the car and night and smog and trees and dreams, inside my head a rainstorm tried to drown out all my senses-- weeping clouds and shiny jewel raindrops, I was so drenched in thought. I was planning, drawing, writing, screaming. I always feel this way when it gets quiet.

audrey and marilyn